Detonate a giant EMP above NYC
and watch all technology fail immediately
then instantly, everything is silent
except the low grumble of passive-aggressive violence
boiling in the veins of stock market traders,
investment bankers, and all major news anchors.
Watching digital money being eaten up by vapors,
fingers pointed aimlessly to pinpoint the perpetrators.
This heinous crime devised by a criminal mastermind?
With public eyes blind and hands tied we can blame that Al-Qeida lie
or Philip J Fry, either way, we'd blame something imaginary.
When right turns wrong to fabricate foresight
we'll claim we held hindsight but didn't fully recognize
the dangers, of always blaming outside strangers
while wealth and power purveyors subtly strangle us cliff danglers.
We feel the repercussions of their actions run deep,
with grim satisfaction they bend us over in the street.
We bail em all out stickin the silver spoon back in their mouths
though they contiue to spit it out we can never snatch their clout.
12.04.2010
11.09.2010
Children's Story?
I was sending some rhymes to Courtny yesterday and she mentioned I should write a children's story. While at work I popped this out in about 15-20 minutes (unfinished, probably won't be):
Jake was a malnourished snake who lived in the desert. He used to eat better when the weather was wetter and he'd catch the field rats with ease. But now the weather was dry like grandma's wrinkly thighs and Jake was so hungry he thought he would die, if he didn't eat soon. It was nearing the end of June and Jake hadn't eaten in a week so he sought shelter under palm leaves at an oasis. On occasion he'd see birds fly by but nothing he could catch in the blink of an eye.
Three hours of sitting and reminiscing of his short life, he finally espied a tasty treat, a meerkat that measured three feet by three feet. Now Jake didn't normally eat meerkats, but figured they were the same as rats just bigger and cuter. This one was especially plump so he thought it'd be an easy lunch, then he could savor the flavor for several weeks later. Jake slyly slid along scorching sand and sunk his teeth into the meerkat's spine. "Eeegads!" the meerkat exclaimed, "why did you bite me with your venomous fangs?"
Instead of replying Jake spit and spat and thought, "gross I can never imagine eating that!" But the damage was done, the meerkat was poisoned, and Jake didn't know what to do. "I'm sorry for you," he said after a pause, "I wish I would've known you tasted worse than horned frogs."
The meerkat panicked and shouted, "I should've listened to mother but I doubted! Now I'm astounded I'll be dead before dusk." Jake felt bad for the plump guy and thought of a plan to save him before he died.
"I'm really sorry buddy, I was feeling a bit nutty under this summer sun, but I know of someone that can help us."
Jake was a malnourished snake who lived in the desert. He used to eat better when the weather was wetter and he'd catch the field rats with ease. But now the weather was dry like grandma's wrinkly thighs and Jake was so hungry he thought he would die, if he didn't eat soon. It was nearing the end of June and Jake hadn't eaten in a week so he sought shelter under palm leaves at an oasis. On occasion he'd see birds fly by but nothing he could catch in the blink of an eye.
Three hours of sitting and reminiscing of his short life, he finally espied a tasty treat, a meerkat that measured three feet by three feet. Now Jake didn't normally eat meerkats, but figured they were the same as rats just bigger and cuter. This one was especially plump so he thought it'd be an easy lunch, then he could savor the flavor for several weeks later. Jake slyly slid along scorching sand and sunk his teeth into the meerkat's spine. "Eeegads!" the meerkat exclaimed, "why did you bite me with your venomous fangs?"
Instead of replying Jake spit and spat and thought, "gross I can never imagine eating that!" But the damage was done, the meerkat was poisoned, and Jake didn't know what to do. "I'm sorry for you," he said after a pause, "I wish I would've known you tasted worse than horned frogs."
The meerkat panicked and shouted, "I should've listened to mother but I doubted! Now I'm astounded I'll be dead before dusk." Jake felt bad for the plump guy and thought of a plan to save him before he died.
"I'm really sorry buddy, I was feeling a bit nutty under this summer sun, but I know of someone that can help us."
10.22.2010
A Wonderful Day
I woke up in Ellensburg this morning and helped myself to a banana and a pack of cookies Courtny left on the desk for me, both were delicious and a nice delight to wake to. Browsed reddit for a bit, got ready for the day and pondered what the afternoon might bring.
Courtny returned from class and suggested we go to:
So she drove us down in her bug that smells like a box of crayons. We get there and order lunch from this girl that Courtny apparently knew, but based on their conversation that went something like:
=Courtny: So are you a senior?
-Girl: No actually I'm a freshman here at central. You're graduated now right?
=Courtny: No not yet this is my last quarter.
Both: <_< .... >_>
It was like they knew each other but didn't, haha. Anyhow, I ordered an egg salad sandwich because I haven't had one of those in years it seems and Courtny gets a tasty vegetable sandwich that had this spread style cheese (i forget what it was) on it and a cookie. After I copy her when she puts the Tim's chips on her sandwich, she mentions that recently she had tried some Pumpkin flavored ice-cream from Winegars, as well as some froyo from Utopia and jokingly added we should go try them all including the Pumpkin Blizzard from Dairy Queen. This. idea. was. AWESOME! So I said, "wait, wait... we should really go do that."
We finished up and off we went! We headed over to Utopia first and saw that this car jumped the parking spot block, so Courtny parked a few spots down from it. We walked into Utopia and got a 16 oz tub of the Pumpkin froyo. At the register the cashier said, "did you guys see that car crash into the front of _____ Bar? apparently his brakes cut out and he couldn't stop and jumped the parking block and hit the front window of the Bar" Luckily for the bar there wasn't much damage done to it but a cracked window. So we look outside and two cop cars pulled up. 'Nothin to see here folks nothin to see' (they didn't really say that by the way), and really there wasn't.
We then go to Winegars. When the cashier at Winegars told me my total was $4.20, I smirked and Courtny giggled. Then we swooped through the drive-thru at DQ and rendezvoused back to Courtny's coop (not to say her place is dirty like a chicken coop i just liked the way that rhymed). We have now completed our Tri-Fecta of Pumpkin Greatness:
From left to right: Winegars, Utopia, DQ.
What a marvelous setup you might say... yes indeed it was. So we decided the only way to really get the taste of all three, was to:
Toss it all into a bowl and chow down. And that's exactly what we did. My tastebuds cried with euphoria when the Tri-Fecta of Pumpkin Greatness entered my mouth. And as you can see we loved it:
Which one tasted the best individually? Sorry to put the local shops down but DQ had the best overall flavor. The blizzard had pumpkin pie chunks blended in which added a great texture and more fullness of pumpkin than the other two. Winegars had the second best. It was more of a hint of pumpkin flavoring with mostly vanilla. Utopia, though it had a nice color it fell a bit short in having that pumpkin zest I expect when it's this season and I'm craving that rich pumpkin flavor.
What a wonderful day it was!
Courtny returned from class and suggested we go to:
So she drove us down in her bug that smells like a box of crayons. We get there and order lunch from this girl that Courtny apparently knew, but based on their conversation that went something like:
=Courtny: So are you a senior?
-Girl: No actually I'm a freshman here at central. You're graduated now right?
=Courtny: No not yet this is my last quarter.
Both: <_< .... >_>
It was like they knew each other but didn't, haha. Anyhow, I ordered an egg salad sandwich because I haven't had one of those in years it seems and Courtny gets a tasty vegetable sandwich that had this spread style cheese (i forget what it was) on it and a cookie. After I copy her when she puts the Tim's chips on her sandwich, she mentions that recently she had tried some Pumpkin flavored ice-cream from Winegars, as well as some froyo from Utopia and jokingly added we should go try them all including the Pumpkin Blizzard from Dairy Queen. This. idea. was. AWESOME! So I said, "wait, wait... we should really go do that."
We finished up and off we went! We headed over to Utopia first and saw that this car jumped the parking spot block, so Courtny parked a few spots down from it. We walked into Utopia and got a 16 oz tub of the Pumpkin froyo. At the register the cashier said, "did you guys see that car crash into the front of _____ Bar? apparently his brakes cut out and he couldn't stop and jumped the parking block and hit the front window of the Bar" Luckily for the bar there wasn't much damage done to it but a cracked window. So we look outside and two cop cars pulled up. 'Nothin to see here folks nothin to see' (they didn't really say that by the way), and really there wasn't.
We then go to Winegars. When the cashier at Winegars told me my total was $4.20, I smirked and Courtny giggled. Then we swooped through the drive-thru at DQ and rendezvoused back to Courtny's coop (not to say her place is dirty like a chicken coop i just liked the way that rhymed). We have now completed our Tri-Fecta of Pumpkin Greatness:
From left to right: Winegars, Utopia, DQ.
What a marvelous setup you might say... yes indeed it was. So we decided the only way to really get the taste of all three, was to:
Toss it all into a bowl and chow down. And that's exactly what we did. My tastebuds cried with euphoria when the Tri-Fecta of Pumpkin Greatness entered my mouth. And as you can see we loved it:
Which one tasted the best individually? Sorry to put the local shops down but DQ had the best overall flavor. The blizzard had pumpkin pie chunks blended in which added a great texture and more fullness of pumpkin than the other two. Winegars had the second best. It was more of a hint of pumpkin flavoring with mostly vanilla. Utopia, though it had a nice color it fell a bit short in having that pumpkin zest I expect when it's this season and I'm craving that rich pumpkin flavor.
What a wonderful day it was!
10.19.2010
Wax'd in a glaze of pure melodies
If you haven't heard Wax at least once you're missing out on the sickest verses and punchlines you'll ever hear. Hands down. Here are some examples for your listening pleasure:
Wax Spits Fury Yet Again!!
Wax Goes Bananas at the Crib
Wax - Music & Liquor
I've been practicing freestyles a lot lately and overall I've been satisfied with the results so far. The more word connections my brain can make the better, it's like opening your fridge and choosing ingredients at random and throwing together a tasty treat... or a bowl of poop, whatever comes out first. Sometimes I spin golden fleece other times it's verbal diarrhea, gotta roll with the punches. As you can see I reference feces a lot, should probably work on changing that... You know who rips rhymes? Danny. Damn that guy's got some sick lines- I secretly think he's a rhymebot built in an underground facility.
More music from yours truly in collaboration with Mikee, and very soon, Breaker when he visits the first weekend in November. Be ready for some sweet satisfaction!
Wax Spits Fury Yet Again!!
Wax Goes Bananas at the Crib
Wax - Music & Liquor
I've been practicing freestyles a lot lately and overall I've been satisfied with the results so far. The more word connections my brain can make the better, it's like opening your fridge and choosing ingredients at random and throwing together a tasty treat... or a bowl of poop, whatever comes out first. Sometimes I spin golden fleece other times it's verbal diarrhea, gotta roll with the punches. As you can see I reference feces a lot, should probably work on changing that... You know who rips rhymes? Danny. Damn that guy's got some sick lines- I secretly think he's a rhymebot built in an underground facility.
More music from yours truly in collaboration with Mikee, and very soon, Breaker when he visits the first weekend in November. Be ready for some sweet satisfaction!
9.29.2010
Cereal Bar
I'm a genius. At least that's what my mom used to tell me, she doesn't so much anymore because in fact I'm sub-level retarded. But anyhow.
The other night I was thinking of how awesome it'd be to open a Cereal Bar. Imagine walking into a place that's styled in popping colors, statues of your favorite cereal characters and giant tubes filled with ANY TYPE OF CEREAL YOU CAN IMAGINE! On the wall behind the bar there would be way too many types of cereal you can choose from, so many in fact you might starve trying to decide. Basically this place would be a safe haven for your munchies. Oh, you want to drizzle maple syrup and nutella on your Cocoa Pebbles and Frosted Mini-Wheats Maple & Brown Sugar!? Go right ahead because in my bar you can mix whatever concoction you want, you can be like a spracked out Merlin except for magic powers you just conjure orgasms to taste buds.
If I open this place on Capitol Hill it'll be the most hipster thing since Zooey Deschanel and swanky indie coffee shops. And somehow, that is beautiful and refreshing.
The other night I was thinking of how awesome it'd be to open a Cereal Bar. Imagine walking into a place that's styled in popping colors, statues of your favorite cereal characters and giant tubes filled with ANY TYPE OF CEREAL YOU CAN IMAGINE! On the wall behind the bar there would be way too many types of cereal you can choose from, so many in fact you might starve trying to decide. Basically this place would be a safe haven for your munchies. Oh, you want to drizzle maple syrup and nutella on your Cocoa Pebbles and Frosted Mini-Wheats Maple & Brown Sugar!? Go right ahead because in my bar you can mix whatever concoction you want, you can be like a spracked out Merlin except for magic powers you just conjure orgasms to taste buds.
If I open this place on Capitol Hill it'll be the most hipster thing since Zooey Deschanel and swanky indie coffee shops. And somehow, that is beautiful and refreshing.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)